May I turn the tables?

Dear Experienced Net Cotton Content Reader,

Our high school sophomore is thinking about college.

She will have choices. Geographically, she might move to the west or east coasts, or abroad. She might soon be far away.

Her mother and I would like to live near her and her younger brother, who will also have his choices, soon enough. Not next door, but near enough to know our kids as adults and, perchance, to have strong relationships with their own children.

We understand the realities.
Many of our own siblings moved to distant towns for college and never returned to live in their original hometowns.

To complicate matters, the Mrs. and I plan to — a decade from now — split our living between Israel and Ohio, six months in each, each year. We won’t be staying put. We know we can’t expect our kids to stay put.

Moreover, we believe that we do not have final authority, and cannot direct this choice. We respect our children’s right to choose their future.

So here are my questions:

  • What situation have you faced that is similar, with a teenager shopping for a college destination?
  • What did you wish to happen?
  • What did you do or say?
  • How did it work?
  • What happened?

I’m asking you to share your own,
direct personal experience.

I’m not looking for advice. Please don’t reply with
theoretical insights or psychology. Please don’t use the word "you" in
your answer. Just "I" statements, please.

You can do it by email, or — better yet, to help more than just me — you can post a comment beloBrwnshoew.


Uh, Artie?

A limited edition reprint of 19th century engraving of a John George Brown painting will be sent to the person whose response is judged (by Mrs. Isaac) to be the kindest and most helpful.